Tuesday, August 21, 2012

An Example of What Happens When We Do Vanilla

Me: Do you want me?
Him: What kind of question is that? Of course I want you. I always want you.
Me: So can we have sex? Like, right now? Cause I want it, but I'm getting tired.
Him: What do you want, a quickie?
Me: Yes.
Him: No.
Me: No? You don't want me for a quickie?
Him: Not really. It always turns into "I can't breathe" and "oh my hair."
Me: What the hell are you talking about?
Him: Fine. We'll go have a quickie, and you'll see.
We go upstairs, unceremoniously get naked, and lie down in bed. I rub his cock until it's hard, and then he starts to climb on top of me.
Him: You're dry.
Me: I'm tired.
Him: I don't care anymore.
His words serve to excite me a little, and I wetten up some. He thrusts inside and leans into me. As he begins to get serious, he balances his weight onto his elbows, but I'm still getting crushed.
Me: Can you lift up a little? I can't breathe.
He shifts his weight, moving over his elbows.
Me: Ow, my hair! Your arm is on my hair!
Him: (still thrusting) I told you. "I can't breathe; oh my hair." Don't laugh, you'll push me out!
Me: (Laughing so hard tears are forming)
Him: (Also beginning to laugh...but still pumping) Fine, laugh. But I'm not stopping.
Me: I can't breathe! Ow, my hair!
Him: .....

(About three minutes later)
Me: Well that was fast.
Him: You asked for a quickie.
Me: I didn't mean that fast.
Him: Too bad. You got what you asked for.
Me: But...could you help finish me off?
Him: Yes. Cause I'm a nice guy. (Starts pleasuring me with his fingers, makes a face at me) "I can't breathe! Ow, my hair!"
Me: (Laughing) If you make me laugh, I can't come!
Him: Well this sounds like a fun experiment. How long can I keep you from coming by making you laugh?

I did come a few minutes later. But it probably would have taken just as long, and been much more exciting, if I had taken a couple moments to get into the proper headspace before and come with him, instead of trying to take what I call "the vanilla way out."


  1. This was too funny and sounds a bit familiar for some reason, though I can't imagine why. ;) "The vanilla way out" is never as satisfying, imo.

  2. I love what you said here. I did this to my husband the other day. I was tired but we had a nice time even when we feel out of bed!

  3. This is hilarious and I love it. I love fun sex.

  4. The last couple times Master and I had sex with him over me I was having trouble breathing. Not sure why he's pressing down on my chest so hard lately, but he is, and he doesn't like it when I tell him I'm not getting air, but I need air. It's only happened the last couple times, so clearly he's doing something differently.

    1. I get the feeling the "I can't breathe" line is more commonplace than most women like to let on. Mmm...how do I do a poll on my blog??

  5. Well... at least he was right but still nice about it.

    And yeah, 3 minute quickies. Too fast, but damn if anything more than 10 doesn't count as a quickie anymore. Maybe 7? Is 7 good?

    Stay SINful
    Mr. AP

    1. If I come, it's all good. ;) I can come in three, if I'm in the right headspace. Hell, I can come in one in the right headspace. I've never been able to come on demand with zero build-up, though. I hear it's possible, but not for me.