Me: Do you want me?
Him: What kind of question is that? Of course I want you. I always want you.
Me: So can we have sex? Like, right now? Cause I want it, but I'm getting tired.
Him: What do you want, a quickie?
Me: No? You don't want me for a quickie?
Him: Not really. It always turns into "I can't breathe" and "oh my hair."
Me: What the hell are you talking about?
Him: Fine. We'll go have a quickie, and you'll see.
We go upstairs, unceremoniously get naked, and lie down in bed. I rub his cock until it's hard, and then he starts to climb on top of me.
Him: You're dry.
Me: I'm tired.
Him: I don't care anymore.
His words serve to excite me a little, and I wetten up some. He thrusts inside and leans into me. As he begins to get serious, he balances his weight onto his elbows, but I'm still getting crushed.
Me: Can you lift up a little? I can't breathe.
He shifts his weight, moving over his elbows.
Me: Ow, my hair! Your arm is on my hair!
Him: (still thrusting) I told you. "I can't breathe; oh my hair." Don't laugh, you'll push me out!
Me: (Laughing so hard tears are forming)
Him: (Also beginning to laugh...but still pumping) Fine, laugh. But I'm not stopping.
Me: I can't breathe! Ow, my hair!
(About three minutes later)
Me: Well that was fast.
Him: You asked for a quickie.
Me: I didn't mean that fast.
Him: Too bad. You got what you asked for.
Me: But...could you help finish me off?
Him: Yes. Cause I'm a nice guy. (Starts pleasuring me with his fingers, makes a face at me) "I can't breathe! Ow, my hair!"
Me: (Laughing) If you make me laugh, I can't come!
Him: Well this sounds like a fun experiment. How long can I keep you from coming by making you laugh?
I did come a few minutes later. But it probably would have taken just as long, and been much more exciting, if I had taken a couple moments to get into the proper headspace before and come with him, instead of trying to take what I call "the vanilla way out."