First of all: I've added a little poll on the right. This is your chance to let me know what you want to see in my next book! So please take a moment to give it some thought and vote.
I know I haven't written for a while. Things have been difficult. Issues of the past few months have not gone away, they've just been simmering, so I've not brought them up. But they are there, and they are snowballing...and the uncertainty is killing me. I'm stressed, guys. I hate uncertainty. HATE it.
But uncertainty is often a part of life, and life goes on.
Let's talk about toys for a minute, shall we? Husband and I have a fair collection of toys. Of course, what you consider a "good" collection depends on what you like. I have a friend who feels she needs nothing but a hitachi as a toy, but she has five of them in her collection. She thinks I'm nuts for not having even one. But she has no bondage equipment, no pain implements, not even a paddle, because she just doesn't feel like she needs any. Of course, all her partners have their own collections of toys and gear, so in a way, I guess she's right.
She just makes sure to take one of her hitachis wherever she goes.
Husband and I have an array of equipment including cuffs, spreader bars, rope, floggers, crops, paddles, clamps, whips, speculums, hooks...you get the idea. We also have a collection of dildos, vibrators, and butt plugs. What we have works for us, but of course, it's always fun to try new things.
This is not to say we need these things to have the sex life we do, or the D/s relationship we have. D/s has nothing to do with toys and gear. D/s is all about what is going on inside your head, the mental place you're in with your partner(s) at the time. Husband does not need rope to tie me up; he can restrain me quite well with a piercing look or the tightening of his lips. He doesn't need a flogger to spank me, either; his bare hand works very well.
But no one can argue sex toys are fun. The point of their existence is to play with them, and when you're adding them to something as already fun as sex, infusing toys to the scene can take it to the next level, and turn it incredibly decadent and raunchy.
To put it simply, toys make life more interesting. They make sex more fun. They won't turn your partner into more of a submissive (or Dom), but they will probably put a smile on their face...eventually.
Once the pain fades a little.