Exercise Should Not Count (But Apparently It Does)

I am currently sick.
I have a cold.
You know what that means for me?
NO S/m.

This does not mean no D/s. Far from it. I often get the brunt of MORE D/s dynamics stuff when I'm sick.
Husband likes to order me around when I'm sick, trying to tell me what to do to get better, because he doesn't like me being sick. He doesn't want a sick wife. He likes me healthy, because when I'm healthy, I'm happy, I can do my job as a mother and wife, I can fulfill my duties running the household, and he can do evil, sadistic things to me.  So he orders me to take it easy, he orders me to put on more clothes, he orders me to take my medicine like a good girl—
He makes me take Airborne, this high dose vitamin C crap, it tastes like cat piss—
Not that I know for sure, I have never tasted cat piss, but if you can imagine it, this would be it—
And he makes me go to sleep early. Like, insanely early.
He treats me like a little girl, which can be sweet at times....

We still have sex. The only times SEX has been "off the table" during our relationship was after each time I had either a baby, or surgery. But when I'm sick, he treats me to relatively painless sex, which means no roughhousing, no tussling, and no imposing physical torment involved.
You know what that means, right? It means no fun.

A friend of mine gave me a new cane last week. Isn't it a beauty?

This friend of mine is a sadist, and when I say sadist, I mean sadist. He's got a sick, twisted, evil fucking mind. He's generous with his toys, and will give them away gladly, because he knows more masochists in the world are suffering horrendous, indescribable pain strictly because of him. I think he considers his sadism a fucking vocation. 
Anyway, he gave me this cane (with the promise I tell him what it feels like, of course), but Husband has not had the chance to do any real damage with it on me so far, because I've been sick.

But I think my luck is about to change tonight.
Husband  called me earlier while I was working out.
"I can't talk right now," I huffed and puffed, "I'm working out."
"Oh, you're well enough to work out?" He asked. "That's good to know."
"Why?" I wheezed.
"Because if you're well enough to work out, you're well enough to get a caning," he said. "I'll see you later tonight."
"Wait! Husband! NOOooooooooo"

Number #5693 why I HATE WORKING OUT.

Update: 
So I got my caning. Hard enough to leave some nice marks, but not hard enough to make those marks last as long as I wanted. *sigh* Someday.
Also, I forgot to mention: The other time sex is Off The Table is on the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur, which happens to begin tonight, at sundown...so no fun for me tonight, either. *SIGH*