Wednesday, January 28, 2015

WAR!

Every morning, on my way to taking Son3 to school, I drop off Husband at the train station. And every morning, I have to play a little game of chicken with the traffic light.
 If it stays red long enough, he can jump out of the car no problem, and I don't block traffic. But if the light turns green, other cars are waiting to go behind me, and I get antsy. (And if the light is green when I pull up, and I have to stop to let him out? I'm a basket case.)

Last week Husband and I got into an argument in the car. Nothing major, just a difference in political opinion (which happens from time to time...a lot). We were pulling up to the light, but it had been red for a while.
"GET OUT," I yelled.
"Jesus, don't kick me out of a moving car," he said, unbuckling his seat belt and opening the door.
"I wouldn't do that," I said, taken by surprise. "It's not like I'm trying to kill you."
"Not today, anyway," he quipped, and slammed the door behind him before I could think up a suitable reply.

Since then, it's been a running joke between us that I'm not trying to kill him "today."
"Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" "Not today."
"Are you going to smother me in my sleep?" "Not today."
"Did you poison my coffee?" "Not today." 

Which is all well and funny, ha ha ha....
Yeah great fun....
Except today....
TODAY, dear readers....
Husband took his pranks on me to a whole new level.

HE HID MY CHOCOLATE.
THIS?
THIS means WAR.

And so if any of you who know us personally happen to notice his absence tomorrow, and wonder what might be the cause, think upon these five words:
Today might be the day. 


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