Husband recently told me it's possible, based on some of the things I've said to people (specifically to men), I might (sometimes) be coming across as a tease. I don't mean to engage in that kind of behavior. Frankly, his statement came as a complete surprise. But after giving it some thought, I realized he might just be right, so I thought some clarification would be wise.
If I say I'm happy to see/hear from you? That doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say I think you look hot? That doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say you're nice/charming/funny/witty/any other pleasant thing to be? That doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say I want to meet you? That doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say it would be fun to play with you? It doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say you turn me on? It doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.
If I say I WISH I COULD FUCK YOU? It means, under other circumstances, I would probably fuck you. Maybe, maybe not. We will never know, because...
I WILL NEVER FUCK YOU. EVER. I AM MONOGOMOUS. THE END.
So I may say things to you that I want you to take as direct fact, or as a compliment, or as something I see no reason for you not to know.
But: I do not mean these things as a come-on. I do not mean to say, "I want to have sex with you." I am not trying to be coy, or elusive, or flirty, or cute.
I mean my words exactly as they come out: You are funny. You are witty. You make me smile. I am happy to be your friend. I am happy you consider me your friend.
There is no ulterior message, I just say what I'm feeling at the time.
Maybe there are people out there who think this makes me a nasty woman; I don't know. I know it makes me happy when I hear (or read) a guy say to me, "I think you're pretty," or "I think you're fun to talk to," or "You make me smile." I don't think in the back of my mind, this man wants to fuck me. Cause in my opinion, that would be ridiculous.
Am I being naive? Should I be more on the lookout for this kind of behavior? Should I change my own?